I’ve been in quite a few conversations lately where people want something, either from someone or from an organization (store, workplace, bank, etc.) and they’ve already made up their mind how the person is going to reply. It’s not even worth the effort to ask because the request is going to be declined.
I could go into the whole self-fulfilling prophecy thing here, i.e. if you are positive that someone is going to turn you down then they probably are, but let’s look above that. First of all, the second that you decide to act on this false assumption, you’re heading down a bad path. You’re acting on an assumption about someone else which makes it “true” when it very well might not have been. Second you’re not letting someone important to you know what your needs or desires are, even though they clearly exist. How can you expect anything good to happen if that’s the case?
The next time you’re “sure” that someone or something is going to act a certain way, ask yourself a very simple question. Did you ask? If not do you think maybe you should?