I have a good friend who is a deflector. We could be having a great conversation, but the second it gets to something that they might want or need help with, they deflect it to something I’m doing wrong. This is an example of a fixed way of being, they avoid doing their own introspective work by deflecting to put the attention elsewhere.
I contend that we all have this in us to some degree. Every one of us likes to deflect, at least a little bit. There’s nothing wrong with it, sometimes we really don’t want to talk about ourselves and sometimes we don’t feel connected to the person in front of us. My only request today is that you just be honest with yourself to see if deflecting is really what you want to be doing.
Is deflecting what you really want? What if instead you listened and picked out the gold for yourself?