Do Not Be a Fixer

When you look at help wanted postings for jobs, many of them are looking for something to be fixed.  These are often companies, or people, who have specific problems like broken plumbing or a slow computer, and they want to see a solution.  On the other hand, the rest of the world often does not work this way. The rest of the world consists of people who repeat the same mistakes, often until they either can’t afford to do so anymore.  People usually aren’t seeking solutions, they are seeking relationships and they are looking to be understood.  

When you become aware of difficulty someone is having, consider just being with them.  You do not need to solve the problem for them.  Just because someone else is stating a problem does not mean they are looking for a solution, and it certainly does not mean they will be happy with yours.  Remember, it is more than likely that they are looking for companions and looking to be understood, certainly this is more likely than the possibility than they are looking to be fixed.  People find solutions to problems when they want to find them, this is how classified ads end up in the newspaper.  Until and unless you are answering an ad, consider just being with a person on their journey.

Do not be a fixer.  Be in relationship, be accepting, and be with people on their journey.

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