People who are truly living in their essence show it all the time. When you are around them, you feel it. There is possibility, you usually feel yourself like you can do anything when you are around someone like that. This is where great new ideas are often born, and where true success starts. This type of being attracts others.
Other people are clearly not in their essence. Unfortunately this type of being is highly contagious. This type of being seeks others, whether they are attracted or not. The mental image I often use with my clients is to imagine Oscar the Grouch. He lives in a trash can and always wants people to join him. He wants collaborators to be with him.
Always remember that being engaged by anybody is a choice. When someone wants to drag you down, it is your choice to let them, or to continue being. You do not have to join Oscar in the trash can no matter how much he tries.